Naqiya Khan ENG-122 Paper#2 Cohabitation before marriage I always had a question in my mind when I was engaged.
Should I move in with my fiancé? Since I was not sure I decided to ask my mother. She was totally against it and suggested me not to move in until I get married. Later I decided to research and then decide. Living together before marriage is a tradition in the United States.
As people think it is a good way to save expenses. Therefore, cohabitation increased as of today. Youngster think that moving in together helps them to know their partner before marriage. And also ease their lives as they can plan for future together. Even though moving in together before marriage can sound really good, but later it can cause a lot of complications. According to the researchers, in 1960 450,000 couples started living together before marriage.
In 1970 the number increased by 530,000. This rapid increase shows that couples try to test their partners before marriage, to see if they are compatible with each other. If you love your partner why do you need to test? In a National marriage project conducted by university of Virginia in 2001 reported that couples did not wanted to marry each other unless they lived together before marriage. Researchers also suggest that couples living together before marriage are less satisfied. Teenagers today do not want to live a committed life. They think marriage is a boundary where you are limited. Whereas if you are cohabiting, and have a feeling of not being suited to each other.
They can just say goodbye and go in the direction they want. But if you are married and does want to continue the relationship divorce cost a lot of money. I could never forget the story of my childhood friend. She was also in a live-in relationship with her boyfriend. In the beginning, when she moved with him he did all the things to make her happy.
As days passed she got to know how dangerous and violent he was. He used to give her drugs in her milk every day without her knowledge. She was in koma for almost 6 months. This shows cohabiting can be very dangerous and torturing. Here are some of the reasons why I think cohabiting before marriage is not a good idea. Firstly, it eliminates the excitement meaning if you live together before marriage there would be nothing new to learn about your partner. If couples move in together before marriage there is a risk that they can get divorced early.
Secondly, there is a high chance that couples who lived together before marriage can have kids. This can cause a lot of problems. According to the pew research center kids with divorce parent or either living with unmarried parents go through a lot of problems. Such as low concentration, worried, complaining. This is can cause depression because the child observes the fighting couples have. I think marriage bounds the couples where they think of the family first. Lastly, couples also come to a point in cohabiting where they are violent, abusive, less concerned about each other, violent. I think every relation has its positivity and negativity.
If you slide into any relationship without knowing its value then it would not last that long. Cohabiting tends to create a lot of expectations from your partners. I am not against cohabiting but I think it creates more trouble than simplicity.
Everybody wants peace and smooth life. Knowing your partner and spending time before marriage is not bad. But just testing and leaving your partner not only just risk your life but also others. As this sets an example for every young couple that this is an easy way to test and see.