We are well aware that everything has both benefits and drawbacks and tough-love parenting is not an exception.
It can be clearly seen that this parenting is the most effective way to raise a child; nevertheless, there does exist some problems as well. In fact, tough-love parenting may be a bad influence on children for three main reasons.First of all, some parents often give their sons or daughters, especially the kids under 10 years old, “the harsh physical punishment” whenever they make any mistakes. If the children do not adhere some regulations, some people mete out them by physical activities such as smacking or slapping. It is seriously believed that physical punishment would create the classical conditioning; thus, the children will not relapse into their old fault.
In the beginning, there could be parent’s anxiety and passion; in contrast, children would be negatively affected both physical and mental health, not only at that time but also the development into adulthood. It is associated with fear of making mistake, antisocial behavior or loss of self-control. The more harsh physical punishment children receive, the more vulnerability they get. On occasion, utilizing physical punishment seem inevitable.
In addition, it is a highly controversial issue that some people think that these were loving discipline and would protect children from harm or bad manner while the others disagree. Children would perform well under pressure on account of physical punishment.Second, tough-love parental approaching in the wrong way would lead to some reverse effects. Some parents dangerously seem unbalanced between warmth and discipline. They protect their children in a serious way instead of training them how to protect themselves, how to be an empathetic, a resilient or a patient person. They overrate their responsibilities and always feel extremely anxious about their children.
Therefore, when a child faces up to any difficulties, he or she is easily vulnerable and need their parent’s understanding and support because he or she cannot tackle this problem by his/her own. They lack confident and basic experience to confront with the trouble. Children need a caring as well as self-developed and exploitation themselves environment. They have to be stronger and gain more experiences. There are some important factors preparing for the better future.Finally, tough-love parenting could be make children easily suffer from emotional abuse because parents ignore them, reject their needs or keep them in isolation.
This parenting could be put some distance between parents and their children. Some people find it hard to show their feeling outside so that they occasionally perform their affection with their children. Likewise, some others always stay behind their sons or daughters, and keep supporting them silently. However, the child’s misunderstanding is synonymous with their belief that their parents do not love them. There could be leave behind both short term and long term psychological impact that make it hard for children to overcome. The children, especially the adolescence, would suffer from depression, low self-confidence, low hope in life or displaying anti-social tendency. The psychological crisis would be getting worse and worse if tough-love parents do not recognize and have any urgent solutions to address this problem.
For instance, some parents believed that prevent their child from keeping in touch with friends or peers would protect them from temptations. Nonetheless, it creates the reverse effects. Children who suffer from emotional abuse in the long time are more liable to be teen-pregnancy, delinquent behavior or substance abuse.
